FOOT: (leading group onstage) Okay, let’s go. Hurry up people; we’re wasting time. Follow me. (pause while group gets center stage) I’d just like to take this opportunity to tell you how lucky you are to have me leading you. After all, where would this body be without me—the feet? I’ll tell you where you’d be; you’d be nowhere! That’s why I’m clearly the most important part of this body.

EYES: What? Are you serious? You’ve got to be kidding me! You wouldn’t be able to go anywhere without me showing you where to step. And you don’t have to be the nose to know how bad your socks smell! If you want to know who’s the most important part around here, it’s me!

NOSE: Excuse me, but may I just remind everyone who smelled the smoke from the kitchen fire last week?

EYES: Oh boy, here she goes again.

NOSE: Who smelled the smoke and warned the entire body of the danger? Who saved us all from a most perilous fate? Who was it that performed that heroic deed? Me -- the nose. I think my lifesaving efforts make me the most important.

MOUTH: You the most important? Oh please. You just smelled the smoke; I was the one who told everybody about it. In fact, I’m the one who tells everybody about everything. I’d just love to see you guys try to go one day without me telling everybody what you need, what you want, what you think. It’s exhausting sometimes.

EARS: Hello? Do you hear yourselves talking? Of course you don’t, not without me anyway. And mouth, there’s a reason why there’s only one of you and two of me. So I think it’s pretty easy to tell who’s the important one around here.

HANDS: You know, I hate to bring this up but I am the only one around here that can actually do anything useful. I tie our shoes, I put on our glasses, I have to hold the tissue when nose does her thing, I wipe the mouth when it’s drooling –

MOUTH: I do not drool!

HANDS: I clean the wax out of our ears. Let’s face it-- 9 fingers, 2 opposable thumbs; I think it’s obvious who has the real talent around here.

ALL: (everyone starts arguing) I’m the most important! No, I’m the most important! (etc.)

BRAIN: (offstage voice yells) Quiet!

EARS: Who said that?

BRAIN: Me, the brain.

ALL: (everyone gasps and acts a little scared) The brain!

BRAIN: Yes, the brain. I have been sitting up here listening to you argue and frankly, I’m tired of it. You are all important. Not one of you could get very far without the others. If any one of you were gone, you’d be sorely missed. And besides, may I just remind everyone who actually controls this body? It’s me, the brain. None of you could do anything without me. So, let’s get our priorities straight, shall we?

ALL: (everyone is kind of embarrassed) Um, yeah. Sorry sir. (exit)